Wednesday, March 23, 2005

Differences

Have you ever noticed what an extremely diverse group of people we college students are? Of course, there are some general observations that tend to be true- such as sorority girls all highlight their hair blonde while engineering girls never even look at theirs. Frat boys only go to class on Wednesdays- and all they talk about in class is the parties on the weekends. Engineering guys go to class every day and every other opportunity they get (study sessions, office hours, etc.)- and all they talk about at parties is their classes during the week. But even though lumping people is easy, there is still so much diversity. I'm not talking about cultural- I have those kind of lectures pouring out of my ears. Nope, I'm talking about how all of us are approximately ages 18-25, we all attend Purdue, we are all college students. But within that group are tons and tons of sub-groups, until you narrow it down to the realization that you are your own unique person. (I sound like an inspirational tape.) You are you- and no one else is just like you. (Of course, the only difference between you and the person across the classroom may be that you like to run barefoot in the snow and they don't- but it's still a difference.) Once again, a rambling thought that wandered it's way into my mind. I just like people watching...

Just for fun, here are some observed differences between the two groups: male and female.
1. A man will pay $2 for a $1 item he needs. A woman will pay $1 for a $2 item that she doesn't need but it's on sale.

2. A man has five items in his bathroom: a toothbrush, shaving cream,razor, a bar of soap, and a towel from the Marriott. The average number of items in the typical woman's bathroom is 337. A man would not be able to identify most of these items.

3. A woman has the last word in any argument. Anything a man says after that is the beginning of a new argument.

4. A woman worries about the future until she gets a husband. A man never worries about the future until he gets a wife.

5. A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend. A successful woman is one who can find such a man. (heehee!!!) :)

6. A woman will dress up to go shopping, water the plants, empty the garbage, answer the phone, read a book, and get the mail. A man will dress up for weddings and funerals.

7. If Laurie, Linda, Elizabeth and Barbara go out for lunch, they will call each other Laurie, Linda, Elizabeth and Barbara. If Mark, Chris, Eric and Tom go out, they will affectionately refer to each other as Fat Boy, Godzilla, Peanut-Head and Scrappy.

Today has been rather normal. If you can call a heinous Spanish test, a paper, and over-sleeping normal. Which it often is. But normal is fun... I am always amazed at all the non-normal things I observe on normal days. For instance. Today, while studying in the Union I saw something that made me vow never to sleep in the Union again. (A vow I will probably break in my next slew of exams, but anyway....) There, curled up in one of the vinyl chairs was an Oriental guy. He had his shoes off, he was barefoot (and needed to cut his toenails), and with his head thrown back was gurgling and snoring synonymously. Number one- I've never seen a guy curl up in a chair. Nor have I ever relished the long-toe nail look- some of us wear socks when we don't have time to groom those extremities. (But then again, they might have clashed with his white pattent leather sandals.) But to top it all off- HE WAS SNORING!!! It apalled me for this simple reason: I snore. And upon hearing him, it came to my attention that during my dozes in the Union I probably snore as well!!! AHHHHHHHHHH!!!! I will never ever sleep in public again! (Until I am exhausted and bored.... like as in next week.)

I observed something else while strolling through Stewart Center. A guy and a girl stopped and looked in one of the display cases. They liked each other. Don't ask me how I knew, I just did. You can tell these things. I became certain of her regard, however, shortly after getting close enough to listen to them. (I was just walking by, not snooping- I haven't stooped that low- yet.) Every word that came out of her mouth was very wooden. Now, I don't know, maybe you guys out there can tell by a guy's voice whether or not he likes the girl he is talking to, but I can't. I can only tell with the very obvious ones- and I think that's more because they are blushing. But girls are a different matter. I can almost always tell. They are either very mean, or very fake. I'll explain the mean later. But today I observed the fake. This girl was talking as though she was an under-paid actress reading from a very poor script. Every line was stilted and fake. She liked him- oh boy (!) did she like him. It was so obvious that I had to grin and chuckle under my breath. I can't even reproduce what it really sounded like. Just that it was very fake and very stiff. Poor girl. He probably thinks she needs speech therapy or something, and all it really is is that she adores him.

On the adoration/emotion line it has come to my attention that guys and girls are very different. It's very hard to explain and I could never put my fingers on it until a fellow female gave me this helpful analogy. Guys are like waffles. Their life is like a bunch of compartments and they are able to section off parts, focus in certain areas, etc. while ignoring the rest. Although they sometimes are unable to partition their emotions/relationships they often rise to the challenge and block them off. We ladies on the other hand are like spaghetti. There are all these different strands in our lives, but they all over lap and inter-twine and are all tangled up in each other. When there is a problem in one area it affects all the others. You have academic difficulties and your relationships are affected. You have guy troubles and everything else goes down the tube too. After having that explained, I felt the relief that only an answered question can bring. Thank you, dear friend, for the analogy. :)

Well, Cognitive Psychology is approaching. And I still need to finish a Spanish paper revision. Today is a beautiful day because tomorrow is Thursday! (WHOO-HOO!!!) And I love this Thursday. I only have two classes, and only one paper due. I'm meeting Cammy for lunch, and I get to do acoustical analysis in the Audiology lab and then...... then it's Passion Play time!!!!!!!!! (which makes me excited for more than one reason... but I won't go into that now. My girl friends are laughing at me.... :p )Gotta go!

Toodles!

Tuesday, March 22, 2005

Bored.... when I shouldn't be

I am currently sitting in the Sweet Shop. It is a very studious atmosphere. There is no reason for this attention wandering. None at all. There are no couples for me to stare at, frat boys to disdain, or laughy girls to grate on my nerves. But for some reason I have no desire to pound away at my Spanish subjunctive verbs and indirect object pronouns. (Which are hampered by so many rules as to be very frustrating. :) ) I'm trying very hard not to be despondent about missing the first Passion Play rehearsal I've missed in 7 years... All well- Spanish is soooo much more fun! (Here the false note of forced cheerfulness in my voice.)

Random thoughts keep floating through my brain, and I think I will be able to concentrate after thrashing them all out. (Not "answering"- but rather "thrashing" kind of like whipping a dead horse.)

I was reading something tonight ("The Enemy Within"- good book) when something became clear to me. We say all the time, "God sees all, God knows all, God is infinite and all powerful. He is a powerful and just judge." And we finish the whole thing off with a smile, like "Ah, isn't that great. What's for Sunday lunch?" When asked if we understand God, we smile blandly and say, "No one can!" I think part of our complacency as American Christians comes from not even attempting to realize how powerful our God is. We've used the words- "awesome," and "powerful" so often that they've lost their meaning. We have grasped the concept that we can't understand God, so we don't even try. We're too lazy.

Conversely, another age-old idea slapped up against me tonight. I am often frustrated that I am unable to fully be awed and truly afraid of God. When I try to understand, write it out, fathom it, I can't. I want to shake with fear, I want to be amazed at the great God who loves me. But somehow my mind cannot wrap around it. And today, I (in a very dim, elusive way) realized why. I am a sinner. I have a sin-cursed, limited mind. (Just ask my biology teacher...) God could choose to let me see him, to understand who he realy is, but the amazement and grandeur of it all would cause my finite mind to snap. The sinful, weak finite cannot understand the blameless, powerful infinite. If I could grasp who God really is, my mind would give out.

Once again, these are random thoughts, and other than the previous two paragraphs, none of these thoughts are inter-related.

If every person in your life is telling you to "go for it." (People you respect, admire, and who you trust) Should you? Perhaps you have doubts and inhibitions. Maybe you feel unprepared, but everything is falling into place, you are receiving positive encouragement from leaders and fellow Christians in your life. Should you jump in? Or is it necessary to wait until you feel confident? Or is this one of those horribly aggravating things that varies from person to person with circumstance to circumstance? Argh! I wish my life came with a book of directions. I know, I know, there's the Bible. But what would be the problem if babies were delivered with their own "Book of Life" in which they would be told what to do when. It wouldn't do it for everything, just big things, and the result would never fully depend on the book, but how you handled life after the big decision, but the big decisions would be made for you. Or helpful suggestions that would make the process easier. Yup, that sounds nice.

Well, I had better go back to hashing out these verbs. Please e-mail me. I get very bored with only my own thoughts to entertain me. You would get bored too if you had to live with my brain!

This was fun... now back to being bored.

No- right attitude: Now back to the wonderfully fascinating intricacies of the Spanish language! :)

Wednesday, March 09, 2005

Favorites

I am devoting an entire blog to my preferences and favorite items, for no other reason than I like to tell frivolous details and I like knowing these things about others. So.... if you want.... you could let me know your favorites. :)
(Editorial note: these are subject to change, and so they often do.)

Courtney's Favorites:
Color: Green and Cantalope pink

Movie Star: Jodie Foster and Matt Damon

Bible Verse: Philippians 1: 9,10

Book of the Bible: 1 Peter

Favorite vacation spot: Mackanack Island and Europe.

Dream job: part time Audiologist at a children's hospital, the other slice of time will be spent
writing New York Times best-sellers....

News Source: World Magazine and Fox news

Dessert: Cheesecake

Painting: The Singing Butler (this has been a favorite for a while- I want a big poster of it for my dorm room- is that ok Molly?)

Author: Jane Austen

Movie: Casablanca (Humphrey Bogart is my hero!!!!)

Class: History 151

Era: Age of Enlightenment/ Victorian Era (fat and white was beautiful....)

Flower: Another tie between roses (yellowy-pinky red) and redish-pink tulips (they are so happy!!!)

Newly discovered music artist: Jesse McCartney and Ryan Cabrera

Song: (three favorites....) My Girl, Beautiful Soul, and Don't Say You Love Me (C-digix is awesome!)

Favorite sappy book: The Scarlet Pimpernel

That's enough.... There are more. I have favorites in nearly every catagory. I'm afraid I'm not very "middle-groundish" in my views and passions. I either really like something..... or not. I'm going to stop there, because I feel another blog coming on....

Bye!

Tuesday, March 08, 2005

Just Noticed...

My blogs with the most comments are those in which I discuss the all consuming topic of love and relationships.

This must be something everyone in this age catagory is interested in.

I should just start a blog devoted entirely to love insights. There's an idea.

Monday, March 07, 2005

YIPPEE!!!!

LOOK! I see the world in PINK! Is there anything better I could hear? I, the girl with a pink coat, pepto-bismal pink nailpolish, and enough pink clothes to make an entire load of laundry. This makes my day. Don't laugh. Take delight in small things. I do. :)

Lucky me.... I'm so glad pink is in style. It makes life so much easier.

I see the world in Pink
Pink:You see the world in bright pink. The world is a
happy, happy place! You love all people and
things!! Life is great! You're just like a
happy child. Spread the cheer.


What color do you see the world in?
brought to you by

Friday, March 04, 2005

(smile)

To make up for my previously posted tirade.....

Sunday school teacher was telling her class the story of the Good Samaritan, in which a man was beaten, robbed and left for dead. She described the situation in vivid detail so her students would catch the drama. Then, she asked the class,"If you saw a person lying on the roadside, all wounded and bleeding, what wouldyou do?" A thoughtful little girl broke the hushed silence, "I think I'd throw up."

(That definitely me...)

Nine-year-old Joey, was asked by his mother what he had learned in Sunday school. "Well, Mom, our teacher told us how God sent Moses behind enemylines ona rescue mission to lead the Israelites out of Egypt. When he got to theRed Sea, he had his engineers build a pontoon bridge and all the people walked across safely. Then, he used his walkie-talkie to radio headquarters for reinforcements. They sent bombers to blow up the bridge and all the Israelites were saved.""Now, Joey, is that really whatyour teacher taught you?" his mother asked. "Well, no, Mom. But, if I told it the way the teacher did, you'd never believe it!"

The Sunday School teacher was describing how Lot's wife looked back and turned into a pillar of salt, when little Johnny interrupted, "My Mummy looked back once, while she was DRIVING,"he announced triumphantly, "and she turned into a telephone pole!"

A Sunday school teacher asked, "Johnny, do you think Noah did a lot of fishing when he was on the Ark?" "No,"replied Johnny. "How could he, with just two worms."

Not Myself

Ever have one of those weeks that you reach the end of and wonder if you rember how to laugh? Sometimes smiling is even a problem. And you don't want to go anywhere because if you go somewhere you'll see people you know and they'll expect you to be happy, to be smiley, to be funny. I wonder what would happen if I showed up at church feeling like I do now- and showing it. A little tired, a little depressed, a little disgruntled, and not at all bubbly. I imagine most people wouldn't recognize me or like me. It makes me wonder. Do people like me, or my charade? All my life I've been told, "be polite." "Smile." "Say such and such to so and so." What would happen if I just showed up and burst into tears on Amanda's shoulder, snapped David's head off, ignored Mandy and Jamie, gave Zach a punch on his nose, and refused to laugh and grin with Kyle, Debi, Karie, Rachel, etc.? Would people still like me? Or would I, in one night, lose all the relationships I have developed? I'm scared to find out. What if I'm completely unlikeable?

When I go to church I have to perform. I have to smile. I have to be interested in everyone and everything about their lives. I know everyone's names, and I'm always asked about so and so. I'm Courtney Blake, if I was caught anywhere near the alcohol in a grocery store (nevermind if I was looking at frozen dinners) my dad would hear about it. I go to church. I'm the daughter of the people who teach the parenting class. (Be glad you don't have that stigma.) If, maybe just once, I showed up at church showing my need for encouragement and my exhaustion- what would happen?

What is church? I go. I serve. I learn. I act. But there's more than that! If I just wanted that I could join the National Association of Volunteer Actors and Actresses! Isn't church where I am supposed to go and be spiritually refreshed? I'm supposed to serve, I know, I've done it my whole life. But isn't the church supposed to build me back up and encourage me after a week of fighting it out on my own? Isn't the church a resting spot for when I'm tired- my refuge from all the trash that's thrown at me each week? Or do I have to go into the church strong, already perfect? Looking at me on Sunday morning you could think: Yup, her progressive sanctification is complete. Why is anything less than that not okay? I don't understand.

Yes, I agree that the church is an evangelism tool, that I can use it to develop my spriritual gifts and minister to the needy. But.... isn't there more?

Answers, anyone?

I'm not myself.....

Wednesday, March 02, 2005

For Your Patience....

Well, I'm back. There are some things you think that just can't be blogged for public viewing. I am becoming more and more reticent about sharing my feelings, although you may not have noticed.... I think if I had gone to school like a "normal" kid, I would be a whole lot less verbal. Partially because I was always afraid of being ostracized and "un-cool." So, that is one of the great "might-have-been"s. "If Courtney had actually gone to school, would she still have a voiced opinion on every topic?" When I was in 5th grade my father told me I was verging on rude with my lack of communication. Since then, I believe he has wished that he had let me stay that way.

I am currently sitting in Stadium Dining Court, or "Ford" as it is supposed to to be called.... (I wonder how long it will be before I call it that...) In a few minutes I will have to traipse across campus and with two other people try to write a coherent research paper on ulcers which is due tomorrow. Nothing like a great topic and a team of busy procrastinators. Honestly, how can you write a paper in a group?

Nothing funny, hilarious, or exciting has happened in my life. (Aside from the fact that I'm missing America's Next Top Model season premier to write this stupid paper.) I am, in reality, a very dull, boring person. I am gradually coming to accept this fact. I will never be intelligent. I will never be gorgeous. I will never be funny, and I will never be interesting. I will never be extremely skilled, I have no special gift. I'm not a spiritual giant, I'm not even interestingly sinful. (I'm sinful, but I'm sinful in petty, shallow, common ways- as in, I'm not a drug addict or a serial killer. Mine's just as bad, just not interestingly horrifying.) I'm not kind, I don't really have the gift of sarcasm. I'm a chronic procrastinator I'm a shameless copy cat of other people. Looking over my life, I've never done anything extreme, abnormal, or heroic. I am, in the very epitome of the word- boring.

But, I am saved by grace. A man, perfect, sinless, shameless, was mutilated and killed for me. I was the reason blood poured from his forehead, but no words came from his lips. I am loved by a love so great that it's measure cannot be written across the skies, and had I all the strength and endurance to sing praise forever, I could not express in full Christ's passion for me. My every breath that is inhaled and exhaled is planned by the God who can name every star and has counted every grain of sand.

I don't know what my future holds, but I am assured that nothing will ever come between me and the great power of my "Abba's" love. I may never do great things in the eyes of the world, but I am sure, if my goal is to show this love, to live this love, to spread this love, and to defend this love, my life will be far from boring.

I am loved.

By GOD!

One word-

wow.